Dead Pool – 2009
- Fidel Castro, but we won’t find out until at least 2012.
- Mel Brooks. Ari says “he’s looking a little weak in the knees.”
- Blue 1985 Nissan Sentra. It can’t hold out forever.
- The popularity of the High School Musical series, thanks to that vampire movie.
- Amy Winehouse. Would you be surprised?
- The auto industry. This time in 2009, we’ll all be driving Peugeots.
- Ted Kennedy.
- Stephen Harper’s credibility. Oh, wait.
- Michael Ignatieff’s leadership of the federal Liberals.
- Billy Graham. Insert joke here.
- Kirk Douglas. He’s what? 186 now?
- Queen Elizabeth II. It’s a long shot. We’re actually convinced she’ll out-live not only her children, but at least two of her grandchildren.
- Bob Barker. So many jokes, so little space.
- Betty White. No more Family Guy guest appearances!
- Margaret Thatcher.
- Roddy Piper.
- Pervez Musharraf.
- Dick Cheney. Heart attack or the wingless quailtards get their revenge and shoot him in the face?
- The Iraqi Shoe Thrower
